Monday, October 7, 2013

All People Matter

This week's post was going to be titled " my favorite things about parenting", and I am still going to write that, but you know when you got something if it keeps you up at night.
I stayed up well into the morning with this post running through my thoughts. And like a writer, had to fight the urge to get up and go write it, and go to sleep so I could work today.
All. People. Matter.
It's not my opinion, it's not a question up for debate. It's plain, it's simple. It's true.
All people matter.
On a humane level we are all human, we are all the same. Our very different bodies all need the same things to survive, a beating heart and nourishment.
On a spirutual level, we all are the same people, who believe different things. Our feelings can be hurt, we can hurt others, we can lie, steal and cheat. We love, we live and forgive.
But every person breathing on this earth, matter, they mean something to someone else.
On an emotional level, we all need love, and security, and the feeling of worth to those around us in order to thrive.
As a mother and overall very in-tune-with-her-emotions person, I want my children to know this, and to live it.
The best way for this to be a normal occuring part of their everyday lives and values is to live it myself.
To be kind, to people, to animals, to my belongings. So they know that it's normal to be kind, and nice to animals, and to take care of their things.
And secondary to this notion to be a harmonic, and healthy and kind to others is the lesson we learn when we must decide and choose when there are people that are negatitve or toxic, or down right mean to us, when we decide that we no longer are going to be miserable because of them.
That they are no longer going to be a part of our lives, due to the pain they have caused, the benefits outweigh the risks of feeling sad due to the loss, and doing so will relieve a heavy burden on your shoulders that their pain was causing you.
In doing so, letting go of these people, it is not to say we stop caring, or they stop "matter-ing" as humans, we don't become malicious towards them.
We are letting them go, we are focusing on our main idea in life, to be happy. We realize that with the negative energy gone we find that those people in our lives who do truley care, love us so intensly, that the loss, isn't really a loss, it's a gain. A gain of knowledge, of experience, and perspective.
These people still matter as humans. They matter to others. But on an emotional level they no longer "matter" to you, they are a part of a previous chapter already written. In doing this, you are taking the burden of their hurt from you, and returning it.

Unfortunetly this is a normal occuring motion in our lives, as humans we have to let others go.
And it will be a hard lesson to learn, when they find that someone whom they thought loved them unconditionally did in fact have conditions, and they were met.
It will make them stronger, and smarter, and that much more caring as humanitarians.
There is value in the process of letting these people go, learning to trust yourself, and seeing the world in all the colors it has.